Michael Has A Bad Day
by HydeandAis
Summary: A Hydefic in which, as the title says, Michael has a bad day. A very bad day. And Sakaki has motheaten coins. You'll have to ask Hyde about that one.


**Disclaimer: I own not WHR, Lysol, or any other undoubtedly copyrighted things in here. **

**Hyde A/N: Hyde returns from the dead! Computer problems. Internet problems, mostly. Actually, the problems aren't fixed, but Ais is posting this for me. Yeah, well, this is my first Michael fic, so I hope you enjoy. **

That day started out as normal as they got for Michael Lee, the STN-J's resident expert on computers. He ate his normal breakfast of greasy fast food. He eased into his chair, put on and turned to high volume his ever-present headphones, and booted up his precious computer.

His computer let out a series of beeps and clicks, indicating reluctance to begin a hard day's work. He murmured softly at it through the noise of his headphones; he knew how it felt.

No one else had arrived yet, so he ran a quick systems scan, just for the fun of it. His expertly contrived hack-proof system was functioning perfectly. He gave a slight smile; all was well with the world.

Then Sakaki entered. He emitted a groan and inquired if Michael happened to have any cheetos on him. Michael nodded towards a nearby bag and Sakaki reached for them.

"Apapap," Michael stopped him, "Pay up first." Too often Michael had made the mistake of loaning Sakaki cheetos and requesting payment later.

Sakaki groaned and muttered something about cheetos and money. He dug some moth-eaten coins out of his pocket and set them on the table. He then retreated with his cheetos to clean his orbo gun and brood.

Meanwhile, Michael dug out the official Tweezers for Handling Anything That Originates in Sakaki's Pockets. (He made a mental note to buy Sakaki mothballs for his birthday.) Holding them at arm's length, he deposited the coins in the official Bucket of Bleachwater for Sanitizing Objects Originating in Sakaki's Pockets.

Then, Karasuma entered. As she passed, she peered into the Bucket.

"What is that?" she asked, examining the coins form different angles.

"Money," Michael told her.

"Oh." She wrinkled her nose.

Then, Michael's computer closed all programs without warning. His heart stopped, he pounced on the mouse, but found himself powerless.

"NOOOOOO!" he cried.

"What?" asked Robin (who had just entered) and Sakaki at the same time.

"My impenetrable self-updating-every-three-seconds-against-known-viruses virus protection has failed!"

"Oh," said Sakaki and Robin (at the same time again).

"'Oh?' Is that all you can say? 'Oh?'"

"Um..." said Sakaki, "I want my money back?"

"You call that money? Miho asked. Michael didn't reply, He had turned back to his computer and was hopelessly clicking and typing.

Sakaki dug his hand into his pocket. (Doujima, who had just entered, brought out a portable can of Lysol.) He came up with a small object, which he threw and hit Michael in the back. With a soft cry, Doujima pounced on it and obscured it in a cloud of Lysol. Michael muttered "ouch" under his breath and ignored it.

Then, the hiss of the Lysol can registered in the back of Michael's mind, and he whirled around.

"Augh! Lysol away from my computer! It already has a virus! It doesn't need Lysol too!" He attempted to fan the Lysol away, but ended up choking on it instead.

Michael collapsed in a heap and lay there for a moment, coughing and contemplating the woes that were piling up around him. When he opened his eyes, he was face to face with a small, damp, round object covered in layers of dust and lint. In fact, he wasn't sure that that wasn't all it consisted of.

Doujima then returned with the official Tweezers, picked up the thing, and dropped it into the Bucket of Bleachwater. She swished it around and watched as its true nature was revealed.

"It's a marble!" she cried.

"Huh?" said Sakaki, looking up from his cheetos.

"A marble?" said Karasuma.

Just then, Amon entered.

"Michael. What are you doing on the floor?" he scowled darkly and intensely.

"He's dying of Lysol inhalation," Doujima told him helpfully.

Amon scowled at her/ He went over to the Bucket of Bleachwater. He looked at it contents from three angles, then three more.

"What is that?" he asked.

"Money," said Karasuma.

"And a marble," Doujima added helpfully.

Amon glared at her, but she was not fazed.

Amon then turned to Michael's computer. He noticed that all programs were completely closed out, something which NEVER happened.

"What's wrong with it?" he asked.

"It has a virus," Michael groaned.

"It closed out all programs," Doujima explained helpfully. She received another Death Glare.

"I'll call someone to come and..." Amon began.

"No!" Michael cried, finally around from his Lysol-induced stupor. "I'll fix it! Don't want an idiot messing with MY computer..." He leapt up from the floor and began clicking, typing, and muttering about megabytes and salvaging. All present were frightened.

**So there it is. Patchouli. Please review. I'll try to get Ais to send them to me so I can at least read them. Before anyone asks, yes there will undoubtedly be more chapters, if Ais will so kindly post them for me. –gives Ais big smile— You're my best friend Ais, you know that, right? **

**May Patchouli never desert you in time of need, **

**--Hyde**

**_For an explanation of what the hell (can I say that? Is this supposed to be G?) anyways, of what's going on, please see our author's profile. Also, I forgot to convert to HTML before uploading, so any bold or italics in the story are probably gone. My apologies. _**

**_And Hyde... you bribed me with chocolate. _**

**_---Aisling _**


End file.
